216 Travel Jokes: Vacation & Aeroplane Puns
Delays, hunger and tiredness are all part of the travel. Now, you can turn them into unforgettable vacations with this huge collection of travel jokes and puns. And I wrote them short so anyone can remember them!
Get ready to laugh before you even get on vacation. This will be fun!
12 Spain Travel Jokes
Here are 12 Spain-themed travel jokes to get you in the mood for sangria and siestas:
- Why did the scarecrow love his job in Spain? …Because he was outstanding in his field!
- I tried to learn Spanish, but when I went on vacation, all I could remember was one phrase… …”Donde está la biblioteca?” (Where is the library?)
- Why was the Spanish chef always getting confused? …He kept misplacing his chorizo!
- What do you call a lazy kangaroo in Spain? …Pouch patata.
- I always pack way too much when travelling to Spain… …My suitcases were practically overweight with guilt.
- How did Darth Vader like his paella? …On the dark side.
- What’s the difference between a good Spanish joke and a bad one? … The Costa! (Get it…the cost!)
- Did you hear about the mathematician who was afraid to travel to Spain? …He heard they have so many problems there with square roots.
- Why did the tomato blush in Spain? …Because it saw the salad dressing!
- Where do sheep go on vacation in Spain? …The Baaa-learic Islands.
- I had the best time at the fiesta in Spain… …It was a real crowd-pleaser.
- What’s a Spanish ghost’s favourite meal? …Boo-ella!
12 Airport SecurityJokes
Here are a dozen airport security jokes to get you chuckling.
- Why did the scarecrow love his job at airport security? …Because he was outstanding in his field!
- I saw a man get stopped at airport security for having a small bottle of water… …In his defence, it wasn’t his fault, it was clearly a case of water mistaken identity.
- What did the belt say to the pants at the security checkpoint? …”Hold on tight, this could get a little rough.”
- Never date a TSA agent… …They know all your baggage.
- TSA agent: “Sir, do you have anything metal on you?” Me: “Besides my crippling anxiety and knees from years of student debt? Nope.”
- I always laugh when I go through airport security. …The struggle to take off my shoes while balancing on one leg is pure comedy.
- Airport security is getting intense. The other day, I had to remove my belt, shoelaces, jacket, dignity… …Next thing you know, they’ll tell me my pants are optional.
- Why did the chewing gum get arrested at airport security? …It was caught in a sticky situation.
- I swear, airport security X-rays can somehow detect snacks I forgot I had.
- It’s pretty tough to smuggle shampoo onto a plane… …They always seem to be head and shoulders above any attempt.
- TSA Agent: “Empty your pockets please.” Me: “Sure, there’s a lifetime of hopes and dreams…”
- Airport security officer: “Please step to the side and open your arms…” Me: “Is this interpretive dance time already?”
12 Airport Jokes
Here’s a collection of airport jokes to get you in the mood while (endlessly) waiting.
- Why did the scarecrow love his job at the airport? …Because he was outstanding in his field!
- What do you call a lazy kangaroo at the airport? …Check-in luggage.
- Always try to arrive at the airport early… …The security lines seem shorter when no one else is there.
- Why did the plane get sent to its room? …Bad altitude!
- What do you call bears with no luggage? …Carry-ons!
- My wife told me I should stop acting like a flamingo at the airport. …I had to put my foot down.
- What’s the difference between a good pilot and a great pilot? …A good pilot lands the plane. A great pilot can use it again.
- What do you say to someone working extra shifts at airport security? …You really scan-dalized me!
- Why did the bicycle fall over at the airport terminal? …It was two tired.
- How do trees get online at the airport? …They log in!
- I got fired from my job at airport security yesterday. … I saw someone suspicious, so I flipped his luggage inside out. It just seemed rude to leave his clothes folded.
- Never date a tennis player. …Love means nothing to them.
12 Travel Jokes for Kids
- Why did the scarecrow love his trip? …Because the field trip was outstanding!
- Where do sheep go on vacation? …The Baaa-hamas!
- Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill? …To get to the bottom!
- Where do cows go for entertainment? …To the moo-vies!
- What do you call a lazy kangaroo? …Pouch potato!
- Why did the picture go to jail? …Because it was framed!
- What’s a ghost’s favourite vacation spot? …The Dead Sea!
- How does the ocean say hello? …It waves!
- What did the traffic light say to the car? …Don’t look now, I’m changing!
- Why did the spider go on the computer? …To check his website!
- Where does a sick boat go? …To the dock-tor!
- Why did the scarecrow get an award? …Because he was outstanding in his field!
12 Knock-knock Travel Jokes
Here are the 12 absolute silliest knock-knock jokes to tickle your travel funny bone.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Kenya. Kenya who? Kenya guess where I’m going on vacation?
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Abby. Abby who? Abby got tickets…we’re going on a cruise!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Alpaca. Alpaca who? Alpaca my bags, we’re going on an adventure!
- Knock, knock Who’s there? Canoe. Canoe who? Canoe help me with this suitcase?
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Hawaii. Hawaii who? I’m fine, Hawaii you?
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Norma Lee. Norma Lee who? Norma Lee I go on this many rides, let’s hit the theme park!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Tank. Tank who? You’re welcome for planning this awesome trip!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Iva. Iva who? Iva feeling we’re about to have a great vacation!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Ada. Ada who? Ada way to start this road trip!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Alaska. Alaska who? Alaska friend to come with me next time!
- Knock knock. Who’s there? Carrie. Carrie who? Carrie on with your luggage, the taxi’s here!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Ben. Ben who? Ben waiting all year for this vacation!
12 Travel Jokes for Adults
Get ready for some good laughs with these travel jokes for more ‘mature’ travellers.
- Why did the scarecrow love his trip? …Because the field trip was outstanding!
- I tried to sue the airport for misplacing my luggage. …I lost my case.
- What do you call a lazy kangaroo? …Pouch potato.
- Why did the melons want to elope? …Because they cantaloupe.
- What’s the best thing about Switzerland? …I don’t know, but its flag is a big plus.
- I went to the worst zoo in the world. All they had was one dog. …It was a Shih Tzu.
- I went on a once-in-a-lifetime holiday. …Never again.
- What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire? …Frostbite.
- I finally got around to booking those flights to Germany. … I’m really excited, but worried I’ll make a franklfurter myself on the plane.
- My wife hates it when I blow air on her while in a foreign country. …She calls it my Czech Republic behaviour.
- I asked a friend ‘Why do you love going to Holland?’ … He said, “Well, I wouldn’t if I couldn’t.”
- Be careful if you decide to skydive on your vacation. …It could really come back to haunt you.
12 Travel Jokes One-liners
Here’s a selection of travel one-liners.
- Why did the scarecrow love his trip? …Because the trip was outstanding in its field!
- I tried to sue the airport for misplacing my luggage… I lost my case.
- How do you prevent a summer cold? …Catch it in the winter!
- I finally decided to take my suitcase on vacation… I wanted to see if it would go any further than I usually do.
- Why do aeroplane seats need a vacation? … They’re always getting reclined by passengers.
- Light travels faster than sound. That’s why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
- I got all emotional at the baggage carousel … It’s nice to see people being reunited with the things they love.
- What do you call a lazy kangaroo? …Pouch potato.
- It’s a small world, but I wouldn’t want to have to paint it.
- Vacation calories don’t count, right?
- My therapist suggests getting out more … Maybe a nice relaxing trip somewhere, she said. I think I’ll become a luggage handler at the airport.
- I packed my suitcase and brought half with me … Unfortunately, it was the wrong half.
12 Travel Dad Jokes
Here are 12 classic dad jokes for your next travel.
- Why did the scarecrow love his trip? …He was outstanding in his field!
- Did you hear about the kidnapping at the airport? …Don’t worry, they’ll let him go once the ransom demands are met.
- My wife’s really mad that I have no sense of direction… So I packed my bags and right!
- Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill? …To get to the bottom.
- Why do bees have sticky hair? …Because they use honeycombs.
- I tried to sue the airport for losing my luggage… I lost my case.
- Why did the picture go to jail? …It was framed.
- Where do crayons go on vacation? …Color-ado!
- Why did the scarecrow get an award? …Because he was outstanding in his field!
- How does the ocean say hello? …It waves.
- Where do sheep go on vacation? … The Baa-hamas.
- Why don’t oysters share their pearls? … Because they’re shellfish.
12 Aeroplane Jokes for Kids
Here are 12 kid-friendly aeroplane jokes that’ll have them giggling.
- Why did the scarecrow love his job? …Because he was outstanding in his field! (Get it, flying over fields?)
- What do you call a lazy kangaroo on an aeroplane? …A pouch potato!
- Why did the aeroplane get sent to its room? …It had bad altitude!
- Where do airplanes go when they get sick? …To the flight doctor!
- What do you call an airplane that does magic? …A flying sorcerer!
- Why was the aeroplane blushing? …It saw the runway’s landing strip!
- How do you keep the sun out of an aeroplane? …Pull up the window shades!
- What do aeroplanes like to read? …Airline magazines!
- What did the ocean say to the aeroplane? …Nothing, it just waved!
- How do bees travel? …They take the buzzzz airlines!
- What do you get if you cross an aeroplane with a magician? …A flying sorcerer!
- Why did the scarecrow fly an airplane? …Because he was outstanding in his field!
12 Aeroplane Jokes for Adults
Here are 12 aeroplane jokes with a slightly grown-up slant.
- Why did the scarecrow love his job? …Because he was outstanding in his field! (Ok, technically not on a plane, but we’re warming up)
- Why did the flight attendant blush after the pilot kissed her? …She realized she was on cloud nine.
- Why are aeroplanes like teenagers? …They are always pushing their limits and going farther than expected.
- How do you get a sweet little old lady to curse? …Cancel her flight.
- I quit my job at the airport baggage claim. …I felt like I wasn’t going anywhere and all the work was too heavy to handle.
- What did the ocean say to the aeroplane? …Nothing, it just waved.
- Why do flight attendants make good therapists? …They’re used to dealing with emotional baggage.
- I hate travelling with friends who are pilots. …They’re always making pointless remarks.
- Never date a flight attendant. …They’re always so far away.
- Did you hear about those two pilots who fought in mid-air? …There were soaring tensions.
- What’s the difference between an airplane and a husband? …The airplane stops whining at the gate.
- My new job as an aeroplane repo man has its ups and downs.
12 Aeroplane Food Jokes
Here are 12 aeroplane food jokes to get you chuckling.
- Why did the scarecrow love his job on the plane? …Because he was outstanding in his field!
- What do you call an airline that flies backwards? …A receding airline.
- Why did the aeroplane get sent to its room? …It had a bad attitude!
- Why did the cookie cry on the plane? …Because it was a long flight and he was feeling crumby.
- What’s the hardest part about learning to fly a plane? …Remembering which snacks you packed and which ones the airline gave you.
- How did the peanuts make friends on the flight? …They just opened up and got a little salty with each other.
- I always order a club sandwich on planes… …I’m not really into it, but it’s a popular choice to beat the other passengers with.
- Why was the airplane meal upset? …It had a lot on its plate.
- Why did the scarecrow refuse airline food? …He said the food was a little corny.
- What do you call a lazy kangaroo on an airplane? …Pouch potato.
- How do you make an airplane sandwich? …Put it between two slices of clouds!
- My friend always makes sure he never misses his flight… …He’s terrified of becoming part of the food chain at the airport restaurant.
12 Summer Vacation Jokes
Here’s a set of 12 summer vacation jokes to sheer up your next travel.
- Why did the scarecrow love his job? …Because he was outstanding in his field!
- What do you call a lazy kangaroo on vacation? …Pouch potato!
- Where do sharks go on summer vacation? …Finland!
- Why did the robot go on summer vacation? …To recharge his batteries.
- What did the beach say when the tide came in? …Long time, no sea.
- Why don’t oysters give to charity? …Because they’re shellfish!
- What’s worse than finding a worm in your apple? …Finding half a worm in your apple!
- Where do sheep go on vacation? …The Baa-hamas
- What do you call a snowman in July? …A puddle
- Why did the bicycle fall over? …Because it was two tired!
- What do you call a fish with no eyes? …Fsh!
- Why did the scarecrow get an award? …Because he was outstanding in his field!
12 short vacation jokes
Absolutelysolutely! Here’s a batch of vacation jokes to get you in the mood for some fun.
- Why did the scarecrow love his vacation? …Because he was outstanding in his field!
- Where do sharks go on vacation? …Finland!
- What do you call a lazy kangaroo on vacation? …Pouch potato!
- Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill? …To get to the bottom!
- What’s the best thing about Switzerland? …I don’t know, but the flag is a big plus.
- Why don’t mummies take vacations? …They’re afraid to relax and unwind.
- Where do sheep go on vacation? …The Baa-hamas!
- What did the ocean say to the beach? …Nothing, it just waved.
- Why was the broom late for work? …It overswept!
- How do you prevent a summer cold? …Catch it in the winter!
- What do you call a snowman in the summer? …A puddle.
- Why did the melons decide to get married? …They cantalouped!
12 Witty Travel Puns
Here are a dozen to get you started:
- That trip to Greece was awesome. It was feta-stic!
- Paris? Oh, I Eiffel in love with that city.
- I haven’t been everywhere, but it’s definitely on my Czech list.
- Kenya believe how stunning those views are?
- Beach, please!
- Let’s give this vacation a whirl! It’s about to get plane awesome.
- Travel is my therapy.
- Iceland always takes my breath away – it’s simply gorge-ice.
- These Italian streets are calling, and I must spaghetto.
- I lava a good volcano hike.
- Alpaca my bags, I’m outta here!
- I need to book a trip. I’m getting a serious case of wanderlust.
12 Family Travel Puns
Here are 12 puns to get you and your family giggling on your next adventure.
- Our family trips are always an ad-venison-ture.
- Forget the souvenirs, these memories are truly shore-venirs.
- This trip is unbe-leaf-able.
- I’m having a whale of a time!
- Let’s seas the day!
- I lava this trip.
- Tourist mode: Alpaca my bags!
- Sorry for beach-in’ about the long drive.
- These travel plans are just plane awesome.
- Eiffel in love with Paris.
- This vacation has Taj Ma-hall amazed.
- I always find these trips a-moose-ing.
12 Best Mountain Puns
Here’s a collection of mountain puns to give you a good chuckle:
- Mountains aren’t just funny, they’re hill-arious.
- I don’t know what mountain has the best sense of humour, but Mount Everest is pretty high up there.
- What did the mountain say to the volcano? “I lava you!”
- Why did the climber have a change of heart? He started getting cold peaks.
- Mountains are always up for an adventure. They’re very peak-y.
- I tried to make a joke about mountains…but I didn’t think it had enough hill appeal.
- What do mountains say when surprised? “Holy summit!”
- This mountain range is really something…it’s un-Belize-able.
- Climbing that mountain was tough, but the view made it all worth the uphill battle.
- Mountains are great role models – they inspire people to reach new heights.
- What do you call a friendly mountain? Mount Pleasant.
- Why are mountains so great at problem-solving? They always think outside the peaks
12 Best Swimming Puns
Here are 12 splash-tastic swimming puns.
- Swimming is my jam, just keep me away from jellyfish!
- Training for the big swim meet has been ex-FIN-ding.
- Don’t be koi, let’s go for a swim!
- If you like swimming you must enjoy long strokes – of genius, that is!
- It takes a strong mind not to go off the deep end when training is tough.
- Pool days are fintastic!
- Don’t let anyone rain on your pool parade.
- I have this sinking feeling it’s pool time…
- The other swimmers green with envy at my amazing backstroke.
- Swimming and good jokes always make a big splash.
- Water you up to today? Probably swimming…
- I like to dive headfirst into new challenges.
12 Hilarious Hiking Puns
Get ready to chuckle on your next outdoor adventure:
- I always get so emotional when I reach the top of a mountain. It’s truly a water-shed moment.
- Why did the scarecrow love his job? Because he was outstanding in his field! (Okay, it’s a farm pun, but hikers see fields too!)
- These hiking boots were made for walkin’, and that’s just what they’ll do.
- Some people find hiking exhausting… I find it very re-tree-ting.
- I’m lichen this hike so far!
- Don’t take outdoor adventures for granite – they rock!
- Just trying to avoid getting into any sticky s-tree-uations today.
- This hike is tree-mendous!
- The climb was tough, but the view was worth every uphill struggle. It was truly the peak of my day.
- Hiking up here makes me feel on top of the world… I’m having a mountain of fun!
- Every path I come across, I always take the path of leaf resistance.
- The mountain views never fail to take my breath away. Or maybe that’s just the elevation…
I wish you fantastic holidays with these travel jokes and puns – wherever you go!